Count Binface's 20-Point Plan: From Pluto's Status to Pothole Repairs

Count Binface, the perennial comic candidate known for wearing a garbage can as a helmet, is once again capturing attention in British politics. He is one of 34 candidates contesting the Clacton-on-Sea special election on Thursday, where he faces Reform UK leader Nigel Farage. The major U.K. political parties have boycotted the contest.

Binface, who styles himself as an intergalactic space warrior and leader of the Recyclons from the planet Sigma IX, has built his political persona around absurdist policies and a commitment to reuse. His current 20-point manifesto blends recycled pledges from previous campaigns with new proposals.

Among the highlights, Binface promises to "cut your taxes, and raise everyone else's" and pledges to build "at least one affordable house." He also calls for arcade grabber games to be made fairer, a windfall tax on celebrity-authored cozy crime novels, and a referendum on whether Pluto should regain its planet status.

Infrastructure features prominently in his platform. He proposes filling potholes using copies of the 2024 Labour Party Manifesto, and demands Wi-Fi on trains that works—along with trains that work. Cyclists who break the highway code would be forced to ride unicycles, while those using speakerphones on public transport would face conscription.

His manifesto also includes more whimsical items: banning loud snacks from cinemas, moving a hand dryer at a Uxbridge pub to a more sensible position, and knighting Wallace and Gromit for services to Wensleydale cheese.

On housing, Binface proposes that the royal family keep just one of their four palaces, with the rest gifted to the nation to help eradicate homelessness. If the royals complain, he suggests they be forced to buy Crystal Palace soccer team.

Binface says he stands by his past manifestos, maintaining consistency in his decade-long political career as a candidate in elections against prime ministers and the mayor of London.